Welcome to my life

Today Xander requested to make some cookies. "Sure" I said, innocently not knowing what would then unfold. I was in the mood for some snicker doodles but didn't have a recipe. Not really problem these days with the internet so handy. So I put my laptop on the kitchen island near where we are going to bake and pull up the recipe. By this time Xander has assumed his usual position, sitting on the counter - a painful battle I am not sure I care enough about. I turn my back to gather some ingredient and I hear a water splattering sound. I turn around and I kid you not, Xander is still sitting on the KITCHEN island has not pulled down his pants or underwear but instead has whipped his little doohicky out around his underwear and short leg hole and is aiming his pee all over the place!! On the kitchen counter, on the floor and on our LAPTOP!!! I squeal in horror and tare the laptop away. Then I stood there in a quandary of emotions and thoughts. What do I do?! This was no accident. It wasn't that he just accidentally peed his pants in the wrong spot. He was full on aiming and having a good old time. So I rinse him off with some quality cold water (I am ashamed to say that was for me), put a diaper on him and put him in his room with a lock on his door. I wanted to leave him there the rest of the night (it was 7pm) but knowing that probably wasn't the best but not having my brain working very well due to the horror that still plagued me as I looked at urine all over our kitchen and only computer - I called my sister. "Janea tell me what to do!" I begged. After the shock and the laughter subsided she gave me some great advice and we devised a plan. I felt empowered and ready to deal with Xander.

Here was the plan: Still make the cookies with Soren but Xander cannot help. Then when they are done, while Soren and I ate the cookies, Xander had to "practice" going potty as many times as it took for him not to want to do it again plus one more. Then he could have one cookie - he is only 2 after all. Not being able to help and us eating cookies while he had to practice going potty should be pretty upsetting right? That is what I thought. Nope! His flexibility and happy go lucky demeanor shines through again. You know his flexibility is king of interesting because at times he can be VERY controlling and demand things just so or fall apart and cry for an hour. However, when he is in trouble and knows he can't win he becomes Mr. easy going. I suppose that shouldn't be that terrible, but seriously, is it too much to ask for a punishment to actually be painful for him?

During the whole time we were making the cookies he was constantly asking, "Can I stir that? Can I dump that? Can I taste that?" Which the answer was of course always, "nope". Then he would clarify and say, "Oh, because I peed on the computer and table?" No fight, no sadness, no tears - just talk. And when he was practicing the potty runs, he loved it. He got one on one time with Mom, got to run around and pulled up and down his pants 17 times. What isn't there to love for him. I was very straight faced the hole time - not mad but not happy either, but you would have thought I was tickling him every other minute by the way he acted. If he didn't pee on the computer I might have laughed and thought he was cute. Luckily the computer is fine and after a whole box of disinfectants wipes so is the kitchen.

My question is, - Is this normal or are my children as abnormal as I feel they are?

Celestial chicken

I love celestial animals. You know when you have meet one when your young child does all manor of torture to it and it just stands there and takes it. Never retaliating and rarely running away. They are wonderful and I am sure going straight to heaven when that child accidenlty kills them. I have had a few goats like this, but this is the first chicken I have ever had that I actually think I love. I mean who loves a chicken? Usually not me. They are strictly useful animals that are somewhat entertaining and kids enjoy running after. But this little chicken is definantly celestial. Soren takes him out every day and holds him, runs with him, throws him over fences and off the deck (I don't let him do this. He just does it and I always take the chicken away and tell him how horrible that is for the chicken and he always says, "But mom I want him to fly.") The latest abuse was today. I was in the house on the couch and Soren was playing outside. Suddenly he comes in the house and goes, "look mom!" and shoves a chicken in a gallon zip lock bag in my face. It totally scared me. My brain couldn't quite figure out what was going on for about 2 seconds. I mean a fully feathered chicken was in a ziplock bag not moving. Was it dead? Did is suffocate? Will it have brain damage? Was it really a chicken? Did Soren do other things to it while I wasn't looking? All these questions plus 100 more flashed in my brain in 2 seconds. I grabbed the chicken opened the bag and popped his head out. I first started sternly saying, "Soren, we don't put live chickens in ziplock bags", but by the 3rd word I was laughing. Have you ever seen a live chicken in a ziplock? Once the fright subsides it is really funny looking. Unfortunately for the chicken I had to put him back in the bag to take a picture, but then quickly took him out and reminded Soren living animals should never be put in ziplocks, but of course I was thinking in my head, except for pictures but hopefully he did catch that. Here he is. Just chillin in my hand. No chicken I have ever had would do this.

Here he is in a ziplock. Poor guy.

My chicken tractor that I built. I move it every day or two but the chicken poop is so "hot" (lot of nitrogen) that it burns the grass.
These are pictures Soren took. I love the perspective of this picture. Giant chicken little house. Actually alot of his pictures were pretty good and little bit different then I am use to in the angle because he is so much closer to the ground.
Another Soren picture
I love these next two pictures. It just shows how chill this chicken is. Soren just sat with the chicken for 20 minutes and the chicken just sat with Soren. Just a couple of guys, hanging out.
Unfortunately the chicken is a roosters, and we can't keep him. This wonderful animal will probably be eaten at a young age. Not by me but I am going to sell him and roosters are only good for 2 things - fertilizing eggs and eating.........and you don't need too many fertilizers.

Update - while putting Soren to bed I asked him why he put the chicken in the bag to begin with - a question that didn't occur to me at the time. He said, "I didn't want it to poop in the new house." Cleaver. He wanted to bring it inside - a big no no - but not poop in the house, so he put it in a ziplock. My kids definently solve their own problems.......for good or for bad. Right now it seem mostly bad but I know one day......one very distant day it will be good.

Little Mt. Si

On Labor day weekend we hiked with two other families on Little Mt. Si. It is a the biggest hike I have ever done with the boys and one I would describe as a "real hike". It was 4.2 miles and 4,167 ft in elevation. The only bummers were the weather was drizzling the whole time and we went started hiking at noon - prime nap time for Xander so he was not at his optimum. Regardless of those details I thought the boys did great. Xander only hike probably 1/2 mile, but was a pretty good trouper in the pack. Soren was a super star. He hiked the whole thing and was great. The last mile on the end he was complaining that his legs were shivering and begging for the end to come. You know when your legs are so tired the shake? I think that is what he ment. I would just tell him, "No worries Soren. Just say, legs that is okay that you are shiving. Go ahead and shiver but you can't stop me from hiking!" Soren would then reply in sort of a confused state, "But Mom, they are still shivering." for 4 yrs old I thought he did steller and I can't wait to do more hiking. I thought our crowd was pretty cool. One family had a 5 month old and a 3 yr old and one family had a 5 yr old and a 3 yr old. At last hardie friends. They are so hard to come by it seems and I have many of late. A great blessing.

Jack and Soren were great little hikers.

Us at the top. We couldn't stop long because you needed to keep moving to stay warm
I like to take pictures of my friends so that in 5 yrs when they all move away like they always do I can be like, Oh yeah Jake and Kristi ect. Although I think they find it odd.
Victory! Soren really did walk the whole thing, I just had pitty on him when we reached the bottom.