The secret to Home Depot

A few days ago Xander and I went to Home Depot. We were in the electrical aisle when Xander wasn't looking where he was going and bumped his head on something protruding from the aisle. It was a hard bump and he cried pretty good. A Home Depot employee saw the event and was very concerned for Xander. He was fine. It didn't even leave a bump just a little scratch. If they only know what he does at home. Anyway the employee couldn't let it go and was so concerned and kept trying to help and with every questions the employee asked Xander would wail louder and lauder. He asked if Xander needed a bandaid and I said yes just to get the guy away for a bit. Sure enough a Xander stopped crying 30 seconds after he left. By the time he came back Xander was fine and chatting up a storm with this guy. We got on the topic of how all the workers wear orange shirts and apron when the employee brings up these Saturday workshops where kids can come and build things and get their own orange apron. Knowing you have to be 5 to do those I popped that bubble pretty quick for Xander telling him the rule. Then Xander says to the employee, "Who is in charge here? Maybe they will let me go." The employee thought that was so enchanting he left with a new mission. I was just grateful he was gone thinking we are all done with those shinangons and I could get what I came for. I found the electrical guy (who clearly knew nothing) and was asking him a bunch of questions and had just finished clarifying, "so what your saying is you don't really know the difference between these lights?" when the manager comes walking up bearing gifts with 3 other employees. They had a home depot apron and car kit to build. While the manager was talking to Xander he asked what that button was on her apron. She then was like, "Do you want that. You can have it?" Then she took it off and gave it to him. Wow, these people are desperate not to be sued. The manager brought up the kid class and I asked if Xander had to be 5 and she says, "How old is he? 3? Wow, well I think he is ready for this class. He said he builds stuff all the time. If you have any problems you just tell them Shirley said it was okay that he goes." I immediately wondered what else the name Shirley could do for me.

Needless to say I think every time I am at Home Depot I am going to start ramming my own head into things.......maybe I could get some free paint.