Why It Takes a Village

Why it takes a village

We had 4 cousins over for a sleep over last night.  They range in age from 5 to 12.  Xander adores the oldest girls (11 and 12) and they are so sweet to play with him.  Well today while playing Guess who with Kamry I over heard their pre game conversations - about smoking and drinking coffee and alcohol.  Xander has been asking lots and Lots and LOTS of questions about these things.  He notices everyone who is doing it along with people with tattoos and boys with earrings.  He tattles to me about anyone doing or having these things.  I have to play with this strange balance of guiding him away from these things for himself, yet trying to teach him not to be judgmental about others.  It is a tricky balance that I don’t know if I am doing right.  Like today when Soren and Xander was giving hypothetical situations.

Soren “what if everyone in the whole world went to a kids birthday party?”

Quinae “Well that would be a lot of gifts.”

Soren, “No, no one brought gifts.”

Quinae, “Well that is selfish.”

Xander, “No, they just forgot.”

Quinae, “That is still selfish.”

Xander, “Well Ulysses forgot to bring a present to Soren’s party.”

Great!  Now I have just taught Xander to judge others as selfish if they don’t give him things.  You know he is going to remember that for forever and he is going to bring it up often.  Of course I back pedel saying we forgive other and don’t expect thing from people otherwise we are selfish, blah blah blah, but I am pretty sure I have doomed myself for a repeat of this conversation.  

Anyway back to the village.  Today as Kamry and Xander was discussing smoking and coffee.  I came into the middle of the conversation. 

Karmry, “Yeah, you can get addicted to coffee and will need to drink more and more and more and more.

Xander, “Did you know smoking is bad?”

Kamry, “Yeah, it destroys your body.”

Xander, “Yeah, my friend Elizabeth’s Grandma smoked 85 smokes a day and then had to breath out of a tube with a bag but would take the bag away and would still smoke.”

Kamry, “Are you ever going to smoke?”

Xander shakes his head.

Kamry “are you ever going to drink coffee?”

Xander shakes his head, but it is more in a circular motion.

Kamry waits and smiles.  

Xander then admits his thoughts. “Uh, well actually I really want to try smoking, just once.”

Then Kamry launches into anything gruesome and awful she knows about people who smoke.  

With all my conversations with Xander he either admits or gives the impression by his questions he would really like to have earrings, tattoos, smoke and maybe drink alcohol and coffee.  Pretty much if you are encouraged not to, he would like to do that thing.  I don’t know why this is surprising to me. He is a major victim of reverse psychology.  So what do we do about this??  All I know is I am glad I got a village to raise this kid.  Thanks village!

Angry Birds - Christmas Style

This Christmas was a Thompson year.  What that means is we get together for our most beloved Christmas tradition - the gingerbread competition.  It started when I was a teenager and has mutated over the years to adapt to the ever changing needs of our ever growing extended family. This year Angry Bird style. 

 We were given a limited of resources - a box of graham crackers, a couple of bags of frosting and some candy.  Our mission: to build a little city or town that can hold up to marshmallows that would be slingshot at it.  We worked in teams of families and we had two strips of cardboard to fill up with our creations.  Once dried, then each family would pick a name of another family.  that would be the family's creation they would attempt to destroy with marshmallows for 5 minutes.  Each vertical face of their creation would receive a point value. When a vertical wall was destroyed then the point would go to the destroyer. If a vertical remained standing the point would go to the creator.  The winner with the most points would take home the beloved gingerbread trophy to flaunt until the competition. 

These are our creations.

It looks like Xander has been electrocuted.  Ha ha, but it was what he wanted his hair to look like and hey, it is Christmas.

 Here is us with our game face on.  WE WILL DESTROY YOU COROM AND FAMILY!  No mercy!!

 And the time begins!

End Result:

Victory is OURS!! - I love Xander's expression. I wish we had more of his face. So funny!

 Here one is a picture of one going down.  Who knew marshmallows could be so destructive!!

 All in all it was an awesome night.  Zaron's family came out victorious.  We were a close second.  Our creation was the most indestructible I believe, but we also had close to the most vertical walls.  Oh well.  there is always next time!

Here is our whole Thompson clan.  We are lucky enough to be so big that it can create problems, like where to gather.  This is our second family party at the church and it works out so well.  We feel so blessed to be apart of this church and to know of Christ and especially to get to reflect of him during the Christmas season.

Feeding the Homeless

We have been trying to make it a family tradition to feed the homeless on Christmas Eve morning.  We have done it 3 or 4 times so far (although not consecutively) and enjoy it every time. It is such a neat and strange experience to bring hot foods and table and just set up at a park in Seattle and soon homeless people start pouring in.  There are many many families who do this and so the homeless can be quite picky.  So much food and goods to choose from, but they are always have been gracious and kind.  

 Here is Soren making some hot cocoa for a gentleman.  This was the first time my kids were old enough to start doing the serving. It was lots of fun to see that.  Soren took his job very seriously and did good work.   Some people looked like classic homeless people, but others looked like they just came from a place with a hot shower and a laundry facility.  We were able to chat it up with some which is always the highlight of the experience.

My New Hearts Desire!

Yesterday the boys and I skipped school and drove 4.5 hrs to Eugene Oregon and then back for a total of 9hrs in the car before the day was through.  Why you might ask?  To test ride this beauty!

This is not just a Triple Tandem bike.  This is a triple tandem bike that can break down into 2 suitcases for
- easy storage
- easy car travel
- easy plane travel
- easy train travel
- easy elephant travel
- easy camel travel

See where I am going with this?  This bad boy is going to open up the door to possibility.  For 3 years I have been biking with both boys attached to me.  Xander in a seat on my handle bars and Soren in a trailing bike.  It was awesome.  I got a work out, we could go fast, and I wasnt' constantly scared someone was going to biff it, landing in the street and die, or not stop fast enough and get hit by a car, or miscalculate their speed and fly into the lake - all things which have been near misses for us.  Last summer was the first time they were not connected to me.  I loved seeing them ride on their own and was ecstatic when they lost the training wheels.  However after 10 minutes I quickly realized the bummers about "family bike rides" - predominantly the speed of the bike and fear of dismembering limbs.  And so one day I let myself fantasize what type of bike I would like.  I had decided a triple tandem that breaks down would have to be it.  But who makes those. I mean really?  But I flipped my lap top open and in 20 second googled "folding triple tandem" and got a hit.  WHAT?!  They actually make these?  Although expensive it is not fiscally impossible.  And although the store is far, still close enough to try out.  OH MY GOODNESS!  My heart started racing and my mind started running.  "I think I need this" was my conclusion.  I have been working extra shifts and talking to people who knew me about it.  And although this bike made everyone laugh, they all concluded, "yes, I think you need that."

So, yesterday, we did it.  We rented 6 movies from Redbox, set up the portable DVD player, hit he store for snacks and made the drive.  Xander was pitifully sick.  He coughed for the first 5 hours straight and at one point had a fever.  But, if we were at home, he would probably be watching TV all day anyway, so why not in the car I rationalized.  We went on a 45 minutes bike ride to see what the bike was like.  The boys were so close to me I could hear them each talking.  I loved their happy chatter and conversations we had.  I could feel the "turbo boost" they would give when they pedaled hard.  Several times Xander lost his footing on the pedals and we devise a system to work as a team to help him.  I was officially IN LOVE.  I adore activities that require people to work well together as a team.  My favorite sports are team sports.  Anything that encourages that in my family with an air of adventure makes my heart start to flutter.   True the bike is like a semi when it turns and you can feel sideways wobbles, but that is the cost of any tandem.  The bike itself is sturdy and strong, even at the joints. It is well made.

And soooooo.......we bought it on the spot.  Along with mud flaps, a rear cargo rack and adjustable pedels for a better fit for Xander.  Come April (it is custom build and we got a discount if we wait several months) we will be biking in style.  I am already day dreaming of biking and camping Hawaii, no driving Fridays, and dropping and picking up the boys from school with the most awesome ride ever.  I hope people will see us all over town riding this thing and say to themselves, "oh there goes that one biking family.....with all their groceries.  I even day dream how to carry lumber home with it. I mean seriously, isn't that so cool?  Okay so Home Depot runs maybe extreme, but a girl can dream right?  I hope to build many many memories with my boys and this thing.  Thank you Bike Friday!  I can't wait for April!!

Breakfast Bites

While we were eating our waffles this morning this event occurred.

Quinae:  "Xander take that thumb tac out of your mouth.  I don't like that!"
Xander:  "Why?"
Quinae: "Because if you swallow that it could poke a hole in your intestines and spill poop all inside your body, making you very sick and you might even die."
Xander (mater of factly stating): "But then I will get to see Jesus."
Quinae (chuckling):  "Yeah, then you will get to see Jesus.  But you won't get to see your Mom, Dad and brother again for along time.  Pro's and con's ya know."
Soren: "Yeah and they don't have toys, or even video games in heaven.......but they might have food." (a residual point from a previous conversation a few days ago.)

Ah, I love these conversations.  You should note that 15 minutes earlier when they sat up for breakfast, the boys got into a fist fight, punching, slapping, hitting and pushing.  I think someone took someones toy, or maybe chair.  I can't seem to keep all the reasons for the countless fist fights and name calling that is done in our house.  Soren can de-escalate pretty quickly, but once Xander is in that mood it is pretty darn hard to flip him, but I had success with this method (an idea given to me from a friend who did this with her girls when they were little).

Quinae:  "There will be no breakfast unless you apologies....... and hug each other."  I was in the mood for a show.  Soren quickly did so in a sweet manor.  Xander literally crossed his arms turned his back to us and said, "Hmmmf"  Ah, the show I was waiting for.
Quinae:  "That is fine Xander. You don't need to do it.  Only do it if you want to eat breakfast." Some snorting and grunting then came out of Xander followed by a teeth clenching and the words barely escaping his lips, "Sorry Soren."  I would normally not except this, but seeing how it was a multi step process, with the harder of the 2 steps still needing to be done, I let it slide."
Quinae:  "Okay, now hug him."
Xander:  "I am not hugging him."
Quinae:  "Good.  More waffles for me."
More grunting and flexing of the muscles in frustration continues.  Then a quick jump off the stool and hugging of Soren's stool leg followed.
Quinae:  "The stool is not Soren."  More protests and a pitiful lean onto Soren was claimed to be a hug.
Quinae:  "That was weak.  Okay now I want you to both give each other 3 compliments to each other, taking turns."  Now I was enjoying the power hungry boys gives a mom at breakfast time.
Soren quickly begins. "Xander I like your hair.....and your shirt.  That is 2 Mom."
Xander:  "I like your teeth."
Quinae:  "Uh, okay now you have to do one about something you think they are good at.
Soren:  "I like it when you made my Christmas list."
Quinae:  "What?  That didn't happen.  Did you make his Christmas list Xander?"
Xander:  "Yeah!"  He then proceeded to show me his transcription of Soren's Christmas list.  He then felt so proud of himself and how nice he was."
Xander: "I like it when you clean the bathroom for me."
Quinae:  "What?  That didn't happen.  Soren did you clean the bathroom for Xander?"
Soren: "Yeah.  Once I did."
Quinae:  "Wow, okay, um, last one.  I want you to say why you like having the other one as a brother."
Soren:  "Xander I like when your so crazy."  Then Soren acts out how crazy Xander is, which looks like he is having a seizure.
Quinae:  "No, no, no, lets not promote craziness, do another one."
Soren:  "Xander I like when we read books together."
Xander:  "I like playing legos with you.......when your nice." He adds as a jab.

Ohhhhh!  The love I was looking for - attained!  It is a Christmas miracle!  Hot waffles for everyone!  Okay some were less hot, but I did flip Xander's switch.  The rest of the morning he planned things he could do for people for Christmas.  If only he could remain in this mode longer.  I must become a master Xander "switch flipper."

Princess's!

Disney Princess on Ice was in town and I wanted to go.  I dont' have any girls and may never and gosh darn it, I wasn't going to feel sad about never getting to do cute little girl things just because I didn't have any.  So, I purchased 2 tickets and called up my cute 5yo niece Brynlee and invited her on a special Aunt/niece outing.  We were both psyched!  My boys took it pretty well, in fact they helped me pick out my outfit to wear to the princess event.  If I was going to make this night magical, I wanted to do it right.  So, off to Value village we went and we found just the right princes dress.....okay so maybe it was a bit small, but it had spandex and for the price I wasn't going to pass it up.  Soren even spied me perfect matching shoes.  I have never worn shoes like this before........actually the dress was new territory too.  So I was looking good before I set off to get Brynlee.  She too was in her princess dress and off we went.  Of course I was the only adult dressed up like a princess at this thing, but that just made me giggle.  The show was actually way better then I thought it would be.  Brynlee is the youngest of 4 and the whole night she was so confused why she got to go to this alone with me.  She kept reviewing why I took her without her siblings or my kids.  It was kind of funny.  It was tons of fun spending an enchanting evening with my niece and to get some of my girl needs met.  Thanks Brynlee!!

Happy Halloween!!

This year we went trick or treating with my sister Janea in Maple Valley.  Her neighborhood goes all out with decorations and it is really fun.  Kids litter the streets and it feels like a carnival.  The only problem is it is easy to loose your excited child who is running form house to house in the dark of the night.  

 Xander was a ninja on the left and Soren is a scare dude - grim reaper-ish on the right.  Brynlee was a fairy and Dallin was - not really anything.......a very basic knight I guess.  He was a bit grumpy to dress up that night.

 Kamry went trick or treating with her friends, but I suppliked her this dress.  You will see me wearing it in a future post - so stay tuned.  The miricle of spandex!!

 Sadie was a hag - a scary one at that.  Way to work it Sadie.  She went to a party and skipped the tricker treating all together.  She is getting all grown up!!

The boys got a load of candy of coarse. I was so mixed on trick or treating. I wanted them to enjoy the holiday but didn't want to take pounds of candy home.  At the end of the night I offered to pay the boys 2$ per pound of candy they had.  Soren had almost 4 pounds and Xander almost 3 pounds (he did a lot of eating while trick or treating.)  Anyway they took the deal.  So before we left Janea's house, the last trick or treater we told them they were our 100th customer and we gave them all the candy I just bought off the boys.  Now it is another mothers problem.  Muha ha ha ha ha!  The next day I took the kids to value village where they could get the biggest bang for their buck.  They each were able to buy 3 toys and they were feeling so good about their decision to sell their candy.  They never regretted it. It was awesome!!